If you are a birth parent hoping to reunite with your child, there are many adoption reunion resources available to support you. Even if you have little information on your child’s new identity or whereabouts, there are steps you can take.
The following are some ways you can go about finding your child given up for adoption.
If the adoption was an open one, searching for a birth child is easier. Biological parents, in this instance, have more legal permissions and are encouraged to access information about their birth children.
However, if it was a closed adoption, getting information or locating adopted children is more challenging.
Nevertheless, there’s hope in these situations. With the help of technology and persistence, a birth parent can often find information about their birth child and have the opportunity to reconnect.
1. Talk to the Adoption Facilitators
Seek information from where it all began. Even if the adoption took place many years ago, try to remember everyone who was involved, specifically the adoption facilitators.
They may have information to help you refine your search for your biological child. Questions to ask yourself include:
- Did you use specialized adoption services from an agency?
- Were lawyers involved in the adoption process?
- Can you remember the names of individuals or companies involved?
- Did a church facilitate the process, and if so, can you search its records?
- Was your child institutionalized or in foster care before being adopted?
- Did anyone play a part in placing your birth child with their new parents?
- Did you know the adoptive family directly?
- Were you introduced to the adoptive family by someone else?
If you used an adoption agency, this may facilitate an easier process. They’re likely to keep records of a child when adopted out of a group or foster home.
You probably don’t need to track down others who have information on your child. As long as one person you speak with can share the child’s new name or estimated location, your probability of an adoption reunion increases.
2. Make Use of Information You Can Legally Access
State institutions might succeed when individuals and private entities fail to help you. It’s a good idea to search in your state for regulations regarding adoptions and identify what information you can legally request regarding your adopted child. Some states can offer full identifying information about your biological child’s new identity and the location of their adoptive family.
In other states, you may have to go through legal processes with a lawyer to obtain adoption data from them. This may still be a viable option because, in a best-case scenario, the information you locate might bring you closer to being reunited with your birth child.
In the U.S., begin by contacting the county court clerk from the state where the adoption was finalized and petitioning them for any information they can legally provide.
If you live in a different country, search for the regulations in your region that you need to follow to request and obtain the information you want.
Frustrated by the challenges of finding your adopted child? At Adopted.com, we simplify the search process. Create a free profile today to find your adopted child.
3. Check if Your Child Is Registered with Adopted.com
One of the quickest and easiest ways to search for your biological child is through an online adoption reunion registry. At Adopted.com, you can create a free profile and list any information you have regarding the child you gave up for adoption. Information you can share includes:
- Birth date
- Location of birth
- Gender of child
- If you’ve been in contact since the adoption
Adopted.com is the largest adoption reunion registry in the world. Our advanced algorithm gives you the best chance of a reunion.
If your child is also looking for you, they could be one of our 1M+ members.
All you need to do is create a free profile and answer ten simple questions most people know about the adoption. If there’s a potential match, you’ll be notified immediately.
4. Let Your Shared DNA Help Bring You Back Together
Even if you weren’t the one to raise your child, you’ll always share a unique genetic bond. Anyone comparing your DNA can quickly tell that they’re your biological relative.
Companies like MyHeritage, Ancestry, or 23andMe make finding others with a similar DNA sequence easy. The process is simple:
- They send you a home genetic sample kit
- You mail in the sample
- They analyze it and provide you with your genetic profile
- You then make the decision to upload it to their website
- Find more potential leads through a DNA adoption search
Millions of participants have already uploaded their genetic profiles to learn more about themselves. This opens up the opportunity for you to match with your relatives – including your birth child.
Adopted.com offers an easy-to-use DNA comparison tool that works with data from all major testing sites. This maximizes your chances of finding your child with a single DNA test, rather than paying for tests with multiple services.
All you need to do is upload your DNA data to your profile, where it’s standardized to compare against the DNA data of other members.
5. Hire an Adoption Detective
Since there are a lot of people searching for their biological relatives, some private investigators specialize in offering services specific to adoption reunions.
They’re called adoption detectives or investigative genealogists. They gather information from local archives, genealogy databases, individuals, and entities who were involved in the adoption process.
This option can be expensive, but is worth it if you have limited time or emotional resources. They have strategies and access to the right resources to expedite the process of finding information about your birth child. This can alleviate the stress that one may experience when embarking on this journey alone.
6. Leverage Social Media
In today’s digital world, social media can be a powerful tool for reconnecting with loved ones. This is especially true for children given up for adoption.
Platforms like Facebook and Instagram provide opportunities to locate and connect with people. By leveraging social media, you can expand your search and reach out to those who may know or have connections to your child.
Additionally, you can use the search functions on social media platforms to look up potential names, locations, or details related to your birth child. While privacy settings may limit what you can find, connecting with mutual friends or family members can provide important leads.
Be sure to approach this process with patience and care, and always respect the boundaries of your child or their adoptive family when reaching out.
7. Be Patient and Seek Support
Whichever option you select for reconnecting with your birth child, it’s important that you arm yourself with patience. It’s wise to give time a chance to work its magic and not lose hope for your adoption reunion.
Even if you’re not immediately able to locate your child or you learn they’re not interested in reuniting with you – there’s no telling how the future may play out.
Take care of yourself and seek the support you need throughout this emotional and arduous process. If you start feeling overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to ask for support from your friends and family or a therapist or spiritual advisor.
We also recommend looking into joining some adoption reunion support groups. These are communities of other mothers and fathers who have given their child up for adoption and are currently searching for them. Having a community of people who have been through or are currently going through a similar experience can offer insight and hope in times of need.
Our community is a place where we come together to share experiences, draw strength, and find encouragement from others who have walked a similar journey.
Take the next step to find your adopted children today.