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Marinacp

I was dumped at a maternity hospital’s social services wing on 10 September 1997 in Recife‚ Brazil. I was approximately two weeks old‚ according to an exam the hospital conducted. The social workers didn’t ask for the ID or any sort of identfication from the woman that brought me there. She claimed a stranger (the mother) had handed me to her‚ in a square nearby‚ saying she had to make a call and would be right back‚ although I doubt it‚ she could just as easily be my mother. Updated message: I was abandoned as a foundling on the 10th of September 1997 at the social services department of the IMIP maternity hospital. Someone left me somewhere‚ at a sort of social work department of a maternity hospital when I was approximately 2 weeks old‚ and what had happened to me up until that point is a mystery. It's really messed up because in my adoption papers it says that someone was handed me to hold by presumably my mother nearby the hospital while they would make a phone call and they would come back and never did (both women presumably adults)‚ but then apparently someone talked to the people who worked there a nurse at the time‚ and she said what she heard from the people who worked at that department that it was my mother herself‚ a teenager apparently who went to the social work department directly and left me there and didn't provide any identifiable information and they just let her leave. And then I was put up for adoption. But anywhere I ended up here would have been just as bad. They came up with this whole story that the person who got handed me on the street‚ was handed me by an East Asian lady‚ so confusing‚ it’s what’s on my adoption papers‚ but there aren’t many people other than locals here‚ because who would want to immigrate here‚ and I did one of those genealogical dna tests in order to find who did this to me‚ and never got a close enough match‚ but I am not of Asian descent‚ they just said that because to them I looked like it when I was a newborn‚ so they just came up with this whole story to cover up for her‚ and they didn’t take a name or anything. Probably gave birth to me in the hospital and was told to bring me back later‚ and forego the whole adoption process. I never had a life. A childhood‚ young adulthood. I was denied that right. I just want to live a dignified life where I have my needs met and feel safe. Presently‚ I am a forced to "live" in a traumatic‚ disturbing‚ and abusive environment where I can't be myself and where there is nothing for me. A reality where my being and needs are invalidated and I am surrounded by evil in a place I don't belong. In my literal personal hell surrounded by the culture (third world)‚ people‚ situations‚ energies that have traumatised and abused me since birth. A lifelong of trauma and abuse. This has always felt like an ugly charade and cruel experiment‚ I don't see myself in anyone or anything around me. I am so disturbed and in constant fight or flight because this environment and reality simply aren't safe. I am expected to be someone I am not. I am surrounded by everything I hate and disturbs and disgusts me to my core. I never had safety or a home. What I have experienced throughout my whole life has been trauma‚ abuse‚ torture‚ and torment. And I will only be able to breathe and recover when I am somewhere safe and can build my own life. I can't heal surrounded by what makes me sick and traumatised me. It truly is that bad‚ I am forced to live under inhumane conditions that don't match who I am or allow me to live a full life‚ how I can't even interact with this people and environment and be present because I can't live this fake life and being forced to live under a fake identity‚ constant invalidation‚ not having any of my needs met‚ access to any of the stimuli I needed‚ no one can understand me and how this is bad and how I was wronged here and have nowhere to turn. I can't breathe. I just want freedom‚ dignity‚ a home‚ quality of life. Where I am forced to "live" I can't be myself. It's squalid‚ unpleasant‚ morally corrupt‚ ignorant‚ disgusting‚ and disturbing. I technically can't even know it's my birthday (turning 28 on the 28th) for sure since I am a foundling. So I have been a victim of forced birth and a country that doesn’t respect abortion rights. None of this would have happened if she had had the right to abortion. I am a woman who was abandoned as a child in a hostile and inhospitable environment and adopted into an abusive family. If you cannot give a child a good life. Don't have one. You're the one carrying it. It's your responsibility to have an abortion. If it's illegal where you live‚ even more so. Probably even shittier the life they would have had there in the first place. Abortion is another word for mercy. Children don't choose to be born. Life shouldn't be struggle. Just because you hate your life and have low standards‚ don't place that burden on someone who didn't have a choice. It's not its fault you got pregnant. You are not doing anyone one‚ especially not the baby a favour by keeping it. What life circumstances‚ story are you giving your child. Do you want their origin‚ their conception‚ how they came to be‚ and their childhood to be trauma? Are they getting everything they need to live a full prosperous life?