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Markrodriguez1480

I’m looking to find 3 children I haven’t seen them since they were babies I had moved after the mother and I separated to over come drug addiction and about 2-3 years after I do so maintain employment was drug free had my own home and I called their mother and we talked a bit and I told of my recovery and ask her if maybe I could get them for a couple weeks of the summer and spend time with them and her response to me was "No Im afraid that they will have to much fun and not want to go back home with her and hung up I was completely shocked and devastated I tried many of years to contact her a spent many more years thinking of them everyday every min of my life and then I called again she answered an my girlfriend at the time whom was pregnant with my other daughter got on the phone with they said some things had words with each other and I never heard from her again I was so upset about them speaking I knew them I would probably never see them again a few years went by and we having a second child a boy and I been working paying child support for the three and I don’t know if their mother got into trouble with law or what but I got a call from the child support office tell me that they were going to stop my payments I was confused ask why lady told me that the kids were adopted and I said what how did this happen i wasn’t notified or asked me if I could taken nothing she said the mother didn’t know how to get a hold me I said that is bs cause she knew my mother’s phone number it has been the same number for twenty years and they asked me some questions like did I have an any kind of relationship with the kids a bond of some sort I said no I havent had any contact with them since they were babies and asked me if i would want to try to bond with and astablish a bond my responese to that we yes i want that what do i need to do and also during that time my younger brother was shot and killed. And then lost my father so I didn’t have place of my own time got hard for I was still working holding my job but stay with friends and to me as much as I wanted them in my life I couldn’t be selfish and think of myself I had to think about their welfare with out a stable home for them I don’t want to be the one to having them living like that so the adoption lady said well I will leave it open for you so when your ready for them it adoption won’t be closed it took me a little longer than expected to get my self going on my feet cause I was also going through another separation with the my wife and she took my two kids with her back to Arizona but i continue to work just had trouble saving. Money needless to say it took some years to get back more than what I had realized when my mother passed I got hit with a fratetrain my life and world came crash down ended up losing my my home and I fell into a deep depression and carried on for years just didn’t have the will to do anything at all motivation felt like I had no life left me and those years I was lost confused and I dug a hole for myself and I couldn’t get out of it the got into trouble again and my older brother tooke I’m and gote a job workimg at a restaurant I took awhile to get used to the idea of working again and I was difficult at first but I started to enjoy doing the work and all the employees and managers were just extremely good to me made feel welcome there so going to work everyday and I felt my life to stared coming out that whole I dug and it was great I was smiling more feeling alive who now brings me to where I am today it’s been far to long I have a home but don’t have the extra to start a searching for them and I have been searching web sit after web sites all expecting money that I don’t have any just recently I have been diagnosed diabetes and now COPD so now I’m back to square one I prayed. And prayed for the strength to keep moving but the diabetes got me could and then everything thing that I do wether it going for a walk doing strenuous things was out of breath very easily so once again I’m struggling not much I can for them now cause there now grown I’m sure living their own lives and my mind is not getting better and I will not give up on finding them I have search Internet Facebook you name it I searched them but find. Nothing every time